


Not anything they didn't want

by that_weird_gay



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky Barnes Recovering, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Not Steve Rogers Friendly, Nvm they give another one, Protective Bucky Barnes, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Someone give my boys a hug, Suicide Attempt, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Has Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:14:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25396723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/that_weird_gay/pseuds/that_weird_gay
Summary: And who would even be up this early?—————Barnes.Barnes was.At now 2:49 AM he was sitting in the kitchen.Hunched over a cup of coffee.—————Or the one where Tony randomly shares his life story at 2:50am to Barnes. But he ends up sharing more than he wanted too...
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark
Comments: 2
Kudos: 51





	Not anything they didn't want

**Author's Note:**

> This was sitting in my drafts for a while now, it’ll be a multiple part story instead of my original plan of it being a one-shot. I originally had it all done but my phone died before i could save it, so i had to backtrack all i wrote by memory, i hope you like it!

Its 2:47 AM. It was the first time Tony had emerged out from his lab in over 4 days. You see, the rouges had come back recently. It was hell. Its _been_ hell. So tony hides in his lab only coming out when he absolutely needs to, even then he makes sure that he knows everyone is, so that he doesn't have to run into any of them, curtsy of FRIDAY.

But that night he'd muted FRIDAY. He was getting annoyed of her constant talking. _'Boss you need to eat...', 'Boss its been 57 hours...',_ ect. But to give him some credit he was finally getting out of the lab to eat something- drink- coffee. He was getting coffee. And who would even be up this early?

* * *

Barnes.

Barnes was.

At now 2:49 AM he was sitting in the kitchen.

Hunched over a cup of _coffee._

* * *

So when Tony stepped into the room he was honestly surprised to see that Barnes was up. 

Barnes perked up when he heard the door open and the immediately tensed up when he saw who it was.

Tony didn't miss that and he felt guilty. He'd been feeling guilty a lot lately. Everyone just kept on blaming him for things so he accepted it and hopes that he could fix it. 

"Oh uhm. Sorry i didn't know that you where up.. i uh- i could go i-if you wanted me-"

"Hm? Oh no. Uh you don't need to- this is your place after all..." 

"Right... my place- uhm okay."

It was awkward and pretty uncomfortable.

Tony quickly walked over to the coffee machine to see that it was already filled.

"Uh mm- di- did you make coffee" Of course he made the coffee who else would, Tony? I mean he is the only person up at this time who even has a cup of coffee in his hands so-

"oh yeah. Uhm i hope you don't mind?"

"Oh no-no- no, i was j-just wondering thats all." The fuck? Get a load of this, the great Tony Stark was stuttering. Wow.

Tony then quickly filled up his mug and grabbed a spoon. Why? He doesn't know either. He doesn't have anything in his coffee to stir around but it distracted him from the tension so it worked. Almost like a nervous habit per say.

When the tension and awkwardness came to much to bear, tony set the spoon down and turned around to talk to Barnes.

It seems like he wasn't the only one who couldn't take it becuase he heard barnes sigh in relief knowing that the tension was going to broken. But then he quickly sucked in that sigh in fear of what tony was going to say.

Tony noticed that too and felt bad again.

But with tension so thick that you could cut with a knife and serve it like a cake, tony just had to say something- anything. 

And the first thing that just had to come out of his mouth was-

"You know sometimes i have an internal debate on whether or not i should thank you." Tony blurted out. Immediately regretting his decision of speaking.

But barnes seemed interested in what he had to say because honestly barnes was so confused.

Why would tony ever thank him? All he has done to tony has just hurt him so thanks does he have to give?

But nonetheless he titled his head and made a noise of confusion as if to say 'go on'.

"You know- uh... Erm uh killing howard..." And what the fuck?

Barnes thought the same thing too. What the fuck?

Barnes so concerned now. Like uhm did this man really just thank him for killing his father in cold blood? 

But tony kept on going on, realizing he just completely fucked up that sentence.

"Shit i mean- that came out worse than i wanted it too.. but uhm Howard wasn't as good as a dad as most people thought he was."

Concerned and confused Barnes wondered just how many drugs this man was on.

But what made Howard such a horrible dad that tony was thanking him for killing him is what barnes was wondering the most.

Tonys voice sounded heavy as he went on, almost as if he was going to cry. 

"I was 6 when i learned that 'hey if you ever get kidnapped your gonna have to get out on your own'"He said with a wet laugh but then soon sighed as he carried on."Howard never payed the ransoms. _Waste of money_ he said. He hated me and went as far as encouraging my kidnappers to keep or kill me. He seemed mad everytime i came back alive and he was livid if i came back with injuries so bad that i'd have to go to the hospital. He also never called anyone when i went missing either." Tony sighed.

Barnes kind of felt angry at the man he once knew, he wondered what had caused the man to even become that way

As if tony was reading his mind he started talking again.

"After Steve had supposedly died nothing else mattered. It was all about steve. Which lead him to become an abusive alcoholic. It was rare to see him sober and even then he still acted the same. I was 4 when i had made my first circuit board, a complex circuit board. I was so _happy_. I thought that it might impress Howard for once. It didn't. No all it did was fuel his anger even more towards me. So when i went down to his workshop and showed it to him he was unimpressed. He looked at me and then to the circuit boar, then back to me again and slapped it out of my hand. Then told me that _If it can't help find steve then it would never be good enough_ "

Barnes felt an odd sense of protectiveness flare up inside of him when he heard that and it only got worse when tony continued.

"I ended up in the hospital that night. They said that my heart had failed two times during the surgery. I don't remember how bad my injuries where but i died twice and had to have surgery so that must say something. But it was the first time that i had died because of howard and it certainly wasn't the last."

**Author's Note:**

> I’m remembering some of the things that i had wrote down originally, but i still want some insight on how he gives away that he plans on killing him self. Well i have a section already set up for it but i just want to see what ideas you guys have first. 
> 
> i think i just repeated myself lmao :)


End file.
